I Don’t Know What I Want

I hear this statement so often I thought I would write a blog post about it. Most people have had so many disappointments and, in their opinion, made so many mistakes that they just can’t bring themselves to believe that they can achieve what they truly desire. Their fear of disappointment and failure is preventing them from dreaming. My 5th principle for a better life is “Have No Fear, Don’t Look Back.” If you could forget your past, if you had no experiences, then you would see an abundant future. Your fears of the future are only validated by your memories of the past.

You need to find a way to let go of the memories of your past. These memories do not exist anywhere but in your mind. Therefore, whether they affect your present experiences or your future dreams, is up to you, because your mind is the only conduit your past has to affect you and your future. Most of us are trying to fix things that have happened in the past. The things we should not have said or done and the things we wish we would have said and done. We replay events using the actions we wish we would have used and experience the outcome, hoping it will make a difference.

That is a big waste of time. You are missing the now and the opportunities that come with it. You can only change what you are doing now, not the past. If you regret being mean to someone, start being nice to them and other people now. If you wish you took more chances, then take advantages of the opportunities that are available to you now. Forget trying to change your past and take advantage of your present.

In addition, the stress, grief or anger you experience, as you are reliving these memories, is taking a toll on your physical and mental well being. Your physical body does not understand you are remembering, it assumes the memory is really happening for you again and it reacts accordingly. Your body temperature, blood pressure and heart rate will change as you are reliving the events of your past.

Once you can consciously get this, then the next challenge is getting your subconscious mind to accept it. Then it will be working with you towards your goals rather than working against you. This is completely possible, you just need to be patient. You have been giving your subconscious mind different instructions your entire life. It might not catch on right away.

The great news is once you stop reliving the past, you will start dreaming of the future again. The more you dream, the clearer your vision of what you want will become. In conclusion, the problem is not that you don’t know what you want, the problem is you don’t believe your dreams are possible because you are doing nothing more than reliving your past.

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Craig Hallenberger

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